Big Time Addiction
by squoctobird
Summary: Pills. He just needs them to study. You can't study if you're tired. You can't pass if you're tired. And failure is not an option.


**A/N: I loathe author's notes. (Especially the ones where people ramble on about junk that has NOTHING to do with the story.) But despite that, I felt this story needed a little bit of explanation, if only for my own satisfaction. First of all, this story was started to pretty much troll those of us who grew up in the 80s. I was going to write it half heartedly and see who would get the reference. (Sort of like my story The Weekend) But it transformed into more than just a joke and I'm really proud of it.**

**This story is based of a great episode of Saved By The Bell called "Jessie's Song." **

* * *

><p>Logan Mitchell sat at the kitchen table sipping from his 'I heart Math' mug with his face buried in a text book. "Yuck! I hate coffee!" he whined as he poured himself another glass.<p>

"So why are you drinking it?" Kendall asked as he entered the kitchen area.

"To stay awake." Logan let out an annoyed sigh. "I've been staying up late to study for the SAT's this weekend."

"You're the smartest person I know, Logan. You're going to do fine."

Logan took the cup of sugar and put three spoonfuls in his coffee before tilting it to the side and pouring nearly half it's contents into the mug. It was the only way he could tolerate the bitter liquid. "Being smart isn't good enough, Kendall. There are people with straight A's that don't get accepted in highly competitive colleges. I have to get a high score if I want to get in to one of the top medical schools."

James joined the two boys in the kitchen and began scrounging around the cabinets for a snack. After settling for a granola bar, he took the seat next to Logan at the table.

"Are you ever going to take a break?"

"Nope. Can't." Logan didn't even look up from his book.

"Well, you're gonna have to," he commented as he pulled out his phone to view the text message he just received, "Gustavo wants us in the studio in thirty minutes."

Logan groaned and dropped his head to the table in frustration. James placed a comforting hand on the smaller boy's shoulder.

"A break will do you good, Logie. And when we get back I'll help you study."

"But that's prime tanning time, James. You'll bail on me as soon as you see the pool."

"No. I promise. Missing one day isn't the end of the world." James shrugged nonchalantly. "I'll just stay longer tomorrow."

A small smile crept up Logan's face. "Okay, James. Thanks. It means a lot."

* * *

><p>The boys entered Rocque Records and filed into Gustavo's office. Logan lagged behind slightly; he was just so tired. He really didn't want to be here. He wasn't sure how he was going to make it through this day. The coffee didn't seem to be helping much. At least when he was studying he was sitting down, but here he would be standing up while singing and dancing.<p>

"Dogs! Today we're learning a new song," Gustavo bellowed as he handed out the sheet music.

"I'm So Excited?" Kendall questioned with an eyebrow raised. "Isn't this song from the 80s?"

"Yes it is. Griffin wants to try and pull in an older demographic. He thinks that we can draw in ladies in their late twenties and early thirties by covering a song from their teens," Gustavo explained.

Kendall had a skeptical look on his face, but James was eating the whole situation up. "And once we draw them in, they'll stay because no one can resist 'the face.'" James said doing his typical jazz fingers movement.

"Wasn't this sung by a girl group?" Logan said in a weary voice.

"Yes. But what does it matter? Do you want me to hand it over to Kat's Krew?" Gustavo said, anger growing in his voice.

James stood up, and raised his hands up signaling for Gustavo to stop. "No. No. Of course we don't." He shot a glare at Logan.

"I think the song sounds fun!" Carlos said. "I'm so excited! And I just can't hide it!" He started to sing as he jumped up and down on Gustavo's couch.

"Dogs! Into the booth! Let's lay down a rough track." Gustavo shuffled the boys out of his office and made his way to the control room.

* * *

><p>Logan did a pretty good job of staying focused while they sang the song. Standing was actually no big deal when he had his mind occupied by the melody he was singing. Dancing was a whole other story.<p>

Even after Mr. X showed him the new move at least ten times, Logan still couldn't grasp it. Exhaustion was creeping in and his limbs didn't want to cooperate. It was inevitable that he would fall at some point during the rehearsal and when he did, Mr. X's patience crumbled.

"I do not have X-time for this!" he huffed, "I will be back in fifteen minutes. Get your X-act together!" He left the dance studio mumbling something incoherent about bad dancers, but Logan knew it was about him.

It was a known fact that he was the weakest dancer of the four, but today was just embarrassing. He was letting Mr. X down; the band down; his friends down. He couldn't do that to them. He had to come up with a solution- something better than coffee. He would never understand how something that smelled so good could taste so foul, but he went to the break room and downed another cup anyways. The boost of caffeine helped him get through the rest of practice, but just barely. He was so drained that he fell asleep in the limo before they even left the parking lot.

* * *

><p>James and Logan sat on the couch going over definitions of words on the SAT study guide list. When James volunteered to help Logan study, he hadn't anticipated they would still be at it until midnight. They had been studying for over four hours!<p>

"Dichotomy. Wait this can't be a real word."

"It is James. It means-"

"These big words are hurting my brain. I'm tired! Look, it's close to midnight. You know how cranky I am in the morning if I don't get my full eight," James complained.

"Please, James. Just another hour?" Logan begged. "Here, you can take one of these." Logan handed a small pill bottle to the other boy.

"Keep Alerts?"

"Yeah, just like coffee but with out the bad taste. I got them this afternoon at the drugstore."

"Aren't these a lot stronger than coffee?" James questioned.

"Maybe…." Logan shrugged.

James had a worried look on his face. "The label says 'may be habit forming.' You shouldn't be taking these, Logan."

"They sell these over the counter. They're fine."

James wasn't convinced and raised a suspicious eyebrow at the smaller boy. "I think they're dangerous."

"Maybe you're right," Logan lied. He was in no mood to fight. He needed to study and arguing with James would just waste his precious time.

James smiled. "Good, now I'm going to bed. I think you should too."

Logan nodded and James squeezed his shoulder before leaving for his bedroom. As soon as James was out of sight, Logan popped two of the red tablets in his mouth and swallowed them with a gulp of water.

"I just need to stay up a few more hours."

* * *

><p>The annoying buzz of Logan's alarm clock sounded at exactly 6:00 am. His eyes were heavy with sleep and he struggled to open them. He stayed up until about four studying and if he got out of bed now he would have another two hours of study time before they had to go to school.<p>

Logan stood up and yawned as he stretched. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes before walking quietly over to his desk hoping to not wake Kendall. He took a deep breath before grabbing the bottle of Keep Alerts and taking two in his mouth. He swallowed them down with some water from a half empty water bottle and pulled out a math text book. After the two hours had passed, Logan was bright eyed and bushy tailed. He wasn't tired at all. In fact he felt energized.

Unfortunately this feeling didn't last. About halfway through class, Logan started to feel tired again. He was having trouble keeping his eyes open. This did not go unnoticed by Ms. Collins.

"Logan!"

He startled awake with a small yelp. He forgot where he was for a moment, but soon realized he was in class. His face grew red with embarrassment and he offered a sheepish apology. Ms. Collins gave him a disappointed looked and told him to go to the bathroom and throw some cold water on his face. Logan nodded and left the classroom dejectedly.

He entered the bathroom and stared at himself in the mirror. Logan was not pleased with his reflection. Dark bags were starting to form under his eyes. He let out a deep sigh before turning on the faucet and splashing the cool water on his face. It was refreshing, but it wasn't enough to overcome his fatigue.

As he dried his face with a paper towel his mind flashed to the pills in his back pack. Yes, technically it was too soon to take some more, but Logan was really tired. He popped two tablets in his mouth and swallowed them down quickly with a handful of water from the faucet. He felt a little guilty, but he knew this wouldn't be a regular thing. He just needed some extra help to make it through the day.

"Feeling better, Logan?" Ms. Collins asked as he re-entered the classroom.

"Yes ma'am." His face turned red again at the extra attention received by his classmates. He went back to his desk quickly and slumped down in his chair trying to hide. The rest of school went by smoothly. Logan was fully alert and didn't feel the slightest hint of drowsiness.

Before she dismissed class, the blonde teacher cleared her throat to gain everyone's attention. "Remember, everyone! The final draft of your term papers are due on Friday!"

Several groans could be heard from the students, but Logan was mentally face-palming himself. He had completely forgot! He was the type of student to get things done quickly and often turned in his projects and papers in early. Somehow this had slipped by him and he couldn't believe it was due this week of all weeks. Luckily he did have a rough draft complete and didn't have much left to do to it. Just edit it and type it, make a bibliography and title page, write a summary… Actually, he still had quite a bit to finish.

After class, the boys had an hour and a half before they had to be at the studio for rehearsal. Logan decided to take this time to start typing his term paper. The sooner he got this assignment out of the way the sooner he could focus completely on studying.

Logan had been typing away at his laptop when he let out a huge yawn. He was starting to feel tired again. He did his best to ignore it, but his vision started to blur. He reached in his back pack and pulled out the Keep Alerts. He hesitated for a moment, but then quickly popped two tablets in his mouth. He swallowed them down with the soda he was drinking. Every little bit helped, right?

* * *

><p>To say that Logan was hyper at the beginning of rehearsal would be an understatement. He couldn't stand still and he was bouncing around. For once, someone made Carlos look like a sedentary person. Just like a sugar rush, Logan's caffeine high eventually came crashing down. Luckily Gustavo interrupted dance practice to make an announcement.<p>

"Dogs!," he hollered, "I just got of the phone with Griffin. He wants you to perform the new song at his wife's poodle's birthday party. And since some of you are having a hard time learning the dance moves," he shot a look in Logan's direction, "there will be an extra practices this week. Including Friday night."

"But I have the SAT Saturday morning!" Logan protested. "Friday is my last night to study. Plus, I've got to finish this term paper…. and there's the science club meeting… and I'm sure James, Kendall and Carlos are going to need help with their math homework. There's no way I can do it all this week!"

Before Gustavo could yell at the pale boy, Kendall stepped up and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry, Logie. I know you can do it. You've never let us down before." Logan looked up at his blonde friend with a sad smile and nodded.

When the boys got home Logan headed straight to his room to continue working on his term paper. As his computer was booting up, he popped two more Keep Alerts in his mouth with out the slightest hesitation or moral dilemma and swallowed them dry.

The next few days went by similarly. Logan would take two pills to stay awake and study. Two pills in the morning to study. Two pills to stay awake in class. Two pills after school. Two pills before practice. Two pills when he got home. Lather, rinse, repeat. It was a vicious cycle. At the slightest hint of drowsiness, Logan would take more pills.

Thursday evening when Logan returned home from the science club meeting, James was sitting on his bed with his arms crossed over his chest. He had been waiting for the small brunette.

"I found this in your trashcan," the pretty boy said holding up an empty bottle of Keep Alerts. "I thought you were going to stop taking them?"

"I need them to stay awake and study, okay."

"No it's not okay. These are dangerous, Logie. I'm worried about you"

Logan scoffed. "James, I think I know what I'm doing. Future doctor, remember?" He was the smart one after all. He didn't need the pretty one to lecture him about caffeine pills. "Maybe you should mind your business."

James started to respond but was cut off.

"Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get some studying done. Can you please go away?"

The taller boy sighed and walked away. He looked over his shoulder back towards Logan before he made his exit. If looks could kill, then James would surely be dead.

After their conversation, James was even more worried about Logan. It wasn't like him to snap at people. James wasn't sure what to do so he went to the person that knew Logan the best: Kendall. He found the blonde sitting on the couch reading a magazine.

"Kendall, do you have a minute? I need to talk to you about something"

"Sure, James. What's up?"

"I don't know how to say this exactly, but Logan has a problem. He's taking drugs."

"Drugs? Are you crazy?"

James hesitated for a moment. "He's been taking these caffeine pills to help him stay awake to study. I think he's hooked on them."

Kendall laughed. "James. I'm sure you're confused. They're probably just vitamins or something. Logan's way to smart to do drugs."

"But…."

"No, I'm not going to listen to this, James." Kendall stood up, angry. "Logan's my best friend and I know he would never do anything like that. I'm going down to the pool."

He threw his magazine on the coffee table and stormed out of the apartment. James sat there and dropped his head into his hands. If Kendall wasn't going to help him, then what was he going to do?

* * *

><p>Logan's alarm went off at 6:30 am on Saturday morning. He got up, showered, ate breakfast and took his morning dose of Keep Alerts. He gathered his calculator, pencils and everything else he needed for the test. Feeling good about himself, he exited the apartment and made his way to the testing site.<p>

Logan arrived early, a little too early. He was sent to a classroom and had ten minutes to wait before the test began. Those ten minutes seemed like an eternity. Logan couldn't sit still; eyes darted from one end of the room to the other, hands clutched in his lap, and sweat dripped down his forehead. Finally, the proctor passed out the tests and gave them permission to begin. Grateful, Logan dived into the first section. He worked quickly and finished with a loud pencil slap on the desk. The other students in the room glared at him. He gave them an apologetic smile and then waited for the remaining portions of the test. He sped through the last two sections just as quickly, occasionally mumbling quietly to himself. When he finished the last question he was unable to restrain himself and raised his hands with a shout of victory. He once again received glares, not only from the students, but from the proctor as well. Luckily, he didn't have to stay any longer. He turned in his test and shuffled out of them room.

* * *

><p>Kendall entered room he shared with Logan to find the smaller boy sleeping soundly. The blonde hated to wake him, it had been a tiring week for him to say the least, but they had to leave for the concert. He shook him lightly.<p>

"Logie. Time to get up."

"Kendall?" he said, his voice heavy with sleep.

"Yeah, come on buddy."

Logan looked around the room, dazed. "What time is it? I need to take the SATs."

"What are you talking about? You took the test this morning. Don't you remember?"

"I did?"

"Yeah. Come on. Get up. It's 5 o'clock."

Logan stood up. "Where are we going?"

Kendall raised an eyebrow. "We're singing tonight. The party at Griffin's house?"

"That's tonight?" His mind was really fuzzy.

"Yeah, we gotta go now." Kendall grabbed Logan's hand, trying to lead him out of the room.

"Wait." Logan jerked his hand away. "I don't know what to wear!" He started to run towards the closet but Kendall stopped him.

"Kelly's bringing our outfits."

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose, his memory starting to come back to him "I need to take a shower."

"You can't. There isn't enough time."

Tears started to form in Logan's eyes. "Time? There's never enough time! No time to sleep! No time to study!" He started to pace back and forth, slowly coming out of his sleepy stupor.

"I'll never get into a good school. I'll let everyone down!" His voice came out shaky as he could no longer hold back his tears. "What am I going to do, Kendall? I'm so confused!"

Kendall rubs his hand on Logan's back soothingly. "Just calm down. Take a deep breath. It'll be okay."

And just like that Logan's mood changed. "You're right. Everything will be okay. I just need to take a couple of these." He runs over to his desk to get a bottle of Keep Alerts.

"Pills? You mean you really are taking drugs?" Kendall couldn't believe what he was seeing.

"I need them!"

"Logan give those to me!"

Kendall tried to grab the bottle, but knocked it out of Logan's hand instead. The tablets fell to the floor. Logan immediately dropped to his knees trying to save his precious pills.

"I need them, Kendall! I have to sing!"

Kendall grabbed the smaller boy from behind, successfully pinning his arms down to his sides. Logan tried to struggle, but the blonde's hold was too strong.

"No, Logan. You can't sing tonight."

"Yes I can!" He shouted then started to sing. "I'm so excited! I'm so excited! I'm so… I'm… " His voiced caught in his throat and the pale boy started to sob. "I'm so scared!" Logan fell limp in Kendall's arms and shook violently from his sobs. The taller boy pulled him close and hugged him tightly.

"Shhhh. Don't be scared, Logie. I've got you. We'll get through this." Logan wrapped his arms around Kendall's torso and cried into his chest.

"Is everything okay in here?" James stuck his head in the room. "I thought I heard someone crying…." His voice trailed off as he saw that everything was actually not okay.

"Can you call Gustavo and tell him we can't perform tonight? Logie's sick."

* * *

><p>Gustavo was not happy about the last minute cancellation because he knew he would receive the brunt of Griffin's anger. He punished the boys with six hours of harmonies with no breaks on Monday, but Logan wasn't there. After his breakdown, Kendall had spoken to Mama Knight who made an appointment for Logan to see a counselor. He was in his bed resting when the other three arrived home that evening.<p>

"I'm sorry I let you guys down," Logan said softly as his best friends gathered around his bed.

"Forget about that, Logie. The important thing is that you get better." Kendall said with a smile as he squeezed the his shoulder.

"It's all my fault. I always take on too much. I put too much pressure on myself. Why do I always have to be so perfect?" He awkwardly fiddled with the hem of his shirt.

"Don't blame yourself," Carlos said. "We didn't help any. We put a lot of pressure on you, too."

"Yeah, but you guys didn't make me take those pills," he looked up at the Latino. "I can't believe I was stupid enough to get hooked on those things." He shook his head in disappointment at himself.

"Hey, you're not stupid. Everyone makes mistakes," James said.

"I'm surprised you're still talking to me, James. I wasn't very nice to you. Can you forgive me?" Tears glossed his pleading eyes.

"Of course!" He leaned down and hugged the small brunette who smiled.

"James, I owe you an apology too," Kendall said when the two broke their embrace. "You tried to tell me something was wrong, but I wouldn't listen."

He tan boy nodded. All was forgiven. He hugged the blonde but pulled off him quickly when he remembered something.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" James' face lit up. "I got you a present!" He hands a coloring book to the boy in the bed.

Logan raised a curious eyebrow.

"Well, I know how much you like math and I wanted to get you something math related, but I figured you were tired of studying so I got you a color by number book."

"Thanks, James. I love it."

He smiled up at his friends. Logan knew that the road to recovery would be difficult, but as long as he had these guys by his side he could do it.


End file.
